It’s that time again! Time for another Letters to our Children Blog Circle.
Dear Kyla and Lucas,
As you get older you are developing more in your ability to play with others and create friendships. I love watching you with your friends. Sitting back and just watching your personalities and how you tackle play together is so telling about who you are as individuals.
We’ve been trying to go to the rec center’s Open Gym every week (though we haven’t been the last couple of weeks, due to illness) and I see you reaching out to the other kids and playing less with one another. It makes me both happy and sad to see this. I love the bond the two of you have, but I’m glad to know you are able to branch out and make new friends.
Lucas, it seems to be easier for you to approach new friends and start to play than it is for Kyla. You fit in right away and play with enthusiasm. It worries me a bit when other kids start saying “No girls allowed” and you follow suit. I hope you understand why I tell you that you should not say that. Your sister feels left out all too often with your cousins and I hate for her to ever feel like you do not want her around. I know you’re just trying to fit in, but remember that she will always be your sister. Those boys won’t always be your friends. You’re going to need to be her protector. Take care of your sister and give her the help she needs to make friends.
Kyla, you may have a hard time approaching new people, or even responding when they approach you, but you give your whole heart once you do. Hearing you talk about your new friend “Anya” for two weeks after you met her at the park almost breaks my heart. Not because you hold onto that friendship so tightly, but because I didn’t think to talk to the child’s mother and arrange to see her again. You are so much like me and have a hard time feeling like you fit in. It’s hard for me to hear you say “Nobody likes me” when I know it isn’t true. At only 3 years old you already feel so intensely. I know that is going to stay with you, as I still feel that way now. I suppose the reason we butt heads so often is because we are so much alike! I want for you to have confidence in yourself and your ability to make friends. You’re so likable and kind. There’s no reason for anyone to not like you!
I look forward to seeing your friendships grow over the years. I hope that some of the friendships you have now will continue throughout your life. But even if they don’t, I hope you are learning from them how to be a good friend.
I love you always, always!
Some of my friends in my moms group and I have decided to create a blog circle where we will share monthly letters to our children. Please check out my friend Carolyn’s beautiful letter to her daughter here and then follow our circle around until you get back to me.