My IM friend, P, is coming up today for a visit (she lives 4 hours away). She’ll be staying the night, so we’ll have plenty of time for chat, gosip, and bonding. I hope she can help me with my conflicting emotions. I did email her (tried to call, but she was at a quilt show) some of what was going on (without mentioning names), but she never emailed me back… Makes me wonder if she got it or is just waiting to talk in person or what… I dunno. I do know that she’s been super busy lately and hasn’t posted much on TOSS either. But having her here face to face should help. I expect her to be here by dinner time, so there’s still time to clean some more (I’m trying to at least condense the boxes so it doesn’t look quite as cluttered!). I also need to cook for tomorrow. I’ve invited other TOSS girls to come over to hang out. So far there will only be a total of 4 of us (M included), but I was hoping more would come. Oh, well. We should still have fun.
M posted on TOSS that we had met, simply because we knew it would come out eventually since we’ll be seeing other TOSSers face-to-face and it will be obvious that we know each other pretty well. Especially since we’ll be having a BBQ at her house in two weeks where her kids and husband would surely give it away when they recognize and know me. 😉 No one really seemed to connect the fact that she saw me and the email I sent saying I’d gotten together with a good friend and her family and would be seeing her again for lunch. One person did ask if we were matched, but due to a completely different comment. I just said “I’m not matched yet” and left it at that. It was the truth! Who knows if we ever will be.
I like her. I really, really do. But they say that when you find the right person you just “know.” So why don’t I have that feeling? I want very much for her to be “the one” but I don’t want to match if we’re not 100% right for each other. Let me see, what are the pros and cons?
comfortable with each other
love her family
N seems to like them too
agree on many aspects of surrogacy (though we haven’t discussed everything)
she’s aware of my craziness and keeps coming back 😉
she wants another c-section
she sometimes takes several days to email me back
Okay, so the pros outweigh the cons right now, so what the heck is my problem??? I SO need this IM bonding time!