06.13.09
Pediatrician
Today was our first appointment with the pediatrician. Apparently my fears that I am starving my children are almost correct… Kyla dropped to 5 lbs. 8 oz (a 10% loss) and Lucas dropped to 6 lbs. 5 oz (a 7% loss). And since the docs tend to start worrying with at 10% loss, they sent us over to visit with a lactation consultant.
The lactation consultant tried to get an assessment of how much they are getting from me, but neither would latch correctly. 
Apparently, Lucas has a tongue tie (the part that attaches his tongue to the bottom of his mouth is at the tip of his tongue), which makes it difficult for him to use is tongue correctly to get milk. While there the LC had me feed them formula using a tube and my finger. She also gave me some suggestions for improving my supply and showed me a few ways to supplement their feedings. She said they need to be eating at least 1 oz per feeding right now. Of course, I have no idea how much they get from me, but the pump doesn’t get that much, so I’m sure that is why they are losing so much weight (I know babies always lose some, but you know what I mean). She also told me I need to make sure to pump every time they eat, so I can signal to my body that it needs to make more milk. So apparently my days for awhile are going to be feed kid 1, feed kid 2, pump… feed kid 1, feed kid 2, pump… and that’s pretty much all I’ll be doing.
I have started giving them a bottle along with offering the breast, to make sure they get enough. Kyla seems to prefer my breast (I think the bottle is just to fast for her and she chokes), but Lucas is definitely preferring the bottle. I’m hoping that once we get his tongue tie taken care of (she said the ped can clip it) he will be more willing to eat from me. In the mean time, I’m trying my best to remember that at least he’s gotten (almost) exclusively breast milk, even if it isn’t directly from the “tap.”
Time to hit the sack. Two sleeping babies (for now) means we MIGHT get a bit of sleep ourselves!
06.10.09
Birth Story
Sorry to keep you hanging. We went back in Sunday night after food, naps, showers, and a walk. She was still 5-6 cm dilated.
But she had come to the point where she was done. She told the nurse to tell her OB that she wouldn’t leave until she was no longer pregnant. He said to get some rest and he’d come in the morning to break her water.
We were given our own (tiny) room and took the opportunity to get some sleep (as best we could on a hospital bed and cot (at least we have practice). Around 8:15 on Monday morning he broke her water and about 15 minutes later started her on a low dose (4) of pitocin. Contractions got a bit more frequent and a tad stronger, but still not enough… They upped the pitocin to 6 and things really picked up. I decided to go pump one last time (it was emotionally difficult watching LD go through so much for us). About 7 minutes later I get a text from Nathan to “wrap it up.” I pack up my things as fast as I can and rush back to the room. She’d gotten to 8 cm dilation and things were really picking up. Before we knew it she was saying she needed to push and the nursing staff jumped into action, wheeling her down to the OR (for “in case”).
Getting her settled into the OR felt like it took forever, but it probably only took minutes. As soon as Dr. K walked in, he got to work giving LD instructions.
Kyla Rose was born vaginally at 10:59 AM, weighing 6 lbs. 2 oz. and measuring 19.5 inches long. Through my tears I watched the nurses clean off my daughter (my daughter!).
Then I heard LD screaming. Lucas had turned breech and Dr. K was reaching in to turn him manually. Being unmedicated, LD was in a TON of pain (up until then she was very controlled). Finally, Dr. K pulled him out feet first. He didn’t start crying right away and the nurses shooed us away so the could take care of him. Just as they pulled out the O2 mask Lucas let out a great cry! He weighed 6 lbs 13 oz. and measured 20.5 inches long.
I felt torn between my daughter, my son, and LD. As I checked on her she told me to go be with my babies. I was handed Kyla and Nathan got Lucas. Just before we took them to the nursery to be weighed and such Dr. K came to take a look at Lucas and said to make sure they checked his arm because he had felt something pop.
In the nursery we each stayed with one of the twins, then switched. The nurse examining Lucas noticed that he wouldn’t move his right arm, so they contacted the orthopedist and would not let him be moved until after an xray and ortho consult.
I was torn, but Kyla needed to eat, so I went with her to our room and Nathan stayed with Lucas.
I can’t explain how wonderful it was to put Kyla to my breast and have her latch on the first try! She ate for a good 20 minutes before falling asleep.
Nathan called to say that Lucas’s blood sugar was low and they needed to give him vit. D (I think that’s right) either through a tube down his throat or a bottle. As much as I didn’t want to, I okayed the bottle. Later I got a text saying that Lucas’s right arm was broken and they were sending him to NICU until the ortho determined what to do so they could manage pain.
While I was waiting on word about Lucas I texted LD to find out how she was feeling. David texted back to say she was losing a lot of blood and they were taking her for a D&C. I immediately started praying and worrying.
In the mean time, the nursery came to take Kyla for her bath. I decided to take the opportunity to go see Lucas. Unfortunately, the NICU was at shift change and I wasn’t allowed in. So I returned to the room and waited on word from LD’s husband. Just as I was losing patience waiting for them to return Kyla to me I found out LD was back from the D&C (it may sound like it took very little time to get this news,but it felt like an eternity to me). So I went to the nursery and they were just finishing with Kyla. I asked if we could stop at LD’s room first so she could see her.
OMG, seeing LD so pale was heart wrenching. I hated knowing that we had played a part in her feeling lousy. We showed her Kyla, then left to give her some time to heal.
I was finally able to go see Lucas, so Nathan stayed with Kyla while I went to NICU. The orthopedist happened to come by while I was there (along with my SIL). He showed me the xray. Lucas’s humerus bone (the bone between the elbow and shoulder) had a complete break in the middle of it. So he decided to splint his whole arm, just to immobilize it for comfort, as baby bones heal very easily (if an older child or adult had the same break, they would need plates and pins :thud). I sat with Lucas, with my finger in his mouth for comfort, while the doctor wrapped his arm. The brave (or in shock?) boy didn’t cry at all. The only indications that he was in pain were facial expressions and he would suck harder on my finger… After he was done the doc said he saw no reason why Lucas needed to stay in NICU. Yea!!!
He was released to the nursery where they finally gave him a “bath.” While they did that, I went back to the room to try to feed Kyla again. Soon after, we had both babies together for the first time outside the womb. 
There is more to the story, of course, but for now I’m back to feeding my son (he’s doing great!). Both LD and the babies are being released today, so I’ll work on the rest at home.
05.24.09
We made it!
Not only did we turn our movie in on time (with 1.5 minutes to spare!), but the babies behaved and stayed put! 
Another great video race in the can. The whole day I kept thinking about the fact that this time next year our son and daughter will be nearly a year old. I wonder how they’ll feel about video race birthday parties? 
I am looking forward to the day they can join us in the race. Who knows, next year they could have cameos! But no, they will not be staying up with us the whole 24 hours. And they will probably be staying with a grandparent. They’ll have to duke it out over which one gets to do the honors.
Yesterday was very different for us as far as video races go. I was not in the movie at all (this has only happened one other time). I was okay with that, though. Starting on Friday I became incredibly swollen. My ankles were the size of footballs and my toes looked like sausages. It was quite painful. I was much happier behind the camera. I also had to take a break once in awhile to pump. I didn’t pump nearly as many times as I would have on a normal day, but I did manage to get in 5 before we headed to the finish line. I just hope it doesn’t throw me off too much (I wouldn’t think one day would be too big a deal). When we got home from the finish line I decided to pump before going to bed so I could sleep for a longer chunk. I fell asleep attached to the pump. Fortunately, N got a phone call before he got into bed. He noticed I’d been gone a long time (I was pumping in the babies’ room) and he came to find me. I have no idea how long I’d been sleeping. Then, N said my face looked strange (red) and that my mouth was moving funny when I talked. Not sure what that was about.
Oh! And before the race started I decided to pump in the car so I could make it through planning without needing to. We were parked in a handicap spot in the parking garage. Which, unfortunately, is next to the elevators and the security office. After the second security officer came by to check on me I just said “I’m pumping breastmilk.” The security guy put his hands up and said “‘Nuff said,” and backed away. It was pretty funny. It was a great spot for getting out quickly, but it was a bit embarrassing.
Well, I’m off to pump again! Then I think it’s time for a nap. I’m not recovered from yesterday yet…
05.02.09
It doesn’t take much
to make me excited. As a matter of fact, all it took was 1 ounce! LOL Today I got one full ounce of breast milk in a single pumping session and it made my day! Then, to top it off, I got another full ounce the next time I pumped! That sounds like such a small amount, but when you’ve been getting no more than .75 oz for as long as I have, it feels like a huge accomplishment. And it’s a good thing, too. I was so frustrated this week that I was questioning why I was bothering to continue pumping when I was seeing so little progress. I’m too stubborn to give up, though. I’m determined.
It’s also interesting to note that I would have started pumping this week had I been able to follow the “normal” protocol. Because as of this past Thursday, we’re 6 weeks away from the 37 week mark that we’re aiming for. I can’t believe I’m less than 6 weeks away from meeting my babies face to face! The time is going by so fast! I hope I make a good mom!
04.06.09
Exhausted
I got home yesterday around 6:30 or so from the TLA conference in Houston. I’d stayed a couple of extra days to see family (W is getting SOOOO big!). I picked up the dogs and came home to a very empty house. N is on his way home now, but won’t be in until midnight or so.
I was able to get a fridge delivered to our room at the Hilton. They asked if it was for medical reasons, and I said yes. Though I guess technically it was not. At any rate, there was no charge because of my answer (it would have been $25 dollars for any other reason, which I was willing to pay). I did have to dump my first evening/night’s milk, though, because the fridge didn’t get cold and it stunk. I didn’t want to chance it. The next morning I told the front desk and they brought another one. This one smelled better, but wasn’t cold either. Then I noticed there was a knob for the temp. They’d only set it at the first level. I turned it up and all was well. I wasn’t able to pump as often as I do at home, but I managed 6 times each day (normally do 8). Not too bad considering I had to ride the bus back to the hotel every time I wanted to pump.
Today I submitted my letter of resignation to my principal. I had already told her I wouldn’t be coming back and she asked me to make it official so she can start looking for my replacement. It feels very odd to have quit one job when I don’t have another lined up. Well, I guess I do… Being a mom. But I am not used to not having a paying (or grade earning) gig on the horizon.
Speaking of, I MAY have a job opportunity ahead of me after all. And I’m not talking about substituting (though that is still an option). While I was at TLA I took the time to stop by the UNT booth in the exhibit hall. I was looking to talk to my ex storytelling professor. Luckily, I was able to talk with her on Thursday. After doing a little bit of catching up I told her I was wanting to look into working as an adjunct for SLIS. She lit up and said “I’m needing someone for the fall. It’s not storytelling, it’s 5600, but it would get your foot in the door.” I pounced on it. I asked what I needed to do to apply and she said to contact her after the conference and she’d send me the links. I emailed her just a few minutes ago and hope I’ll hear from her soon. The position would be teaching online, which means I could do it from home! And it would be a guaranteed 20 hours a week. She even said we could work due dates around N’s schedule so I’d have time to do grading. The way she talked it would be easy for me to step into this position. She even said “You would work so well with our team!” If this works out I would be SO excited. I really think it would be perfect for me. Keep your fingers crossed that it really does work out!
03.27.09
Painful realization
So as you know I’ve been pumping like a mad woman for almost 9 weeks now. It’s all consuming and even when I’m not pumping I’m thinking about the next time I need to pump. Well, next week I’ll be attending a conference in Houston. I’d already thought about the fact that it will be difficult to get in as many pumpings as I usually do (8-10 per 24 hour period). But today I sat down with the conference schedule and tried to figure out when I would be able to fit in some pumping. It started to look doable. Not a perfect situation, but not the worst either.
Then, on the way home from work today it hit me… What do I do with the milk that I pump? I’ll be staying in a hotel, and I doubt they have a fridge/freezer. I hate to think of pouring it down the drain, but I can’t just leave it sitting out either. I should only be 2 days that I can’t get it into a fridge/freezer (I’ll be staying at my sister’s starting on Friday night), but that’s 8-9 oz down the drain (maybe more)! I know it’s not a lot, but I work hard for that!!! 
BTW- LD went in for the re-do 3D/4D ultrasound today. She said they were able to get pics of both babies (more of Lucas than Kyla). Her DH is going to scan them into the computer so we can see them. I wish I could have been there.
03.17.09
Shower
Well, I survived the shower. And amazingly, opposing family members were quite civil. Mom even talked to Dad on Saturday and didn’t bolt at the first opportunity.
I always feel awkward when the only reason a group of people is gathered together is because they all know me. I feel like I have to spend time with everyone, yet there never seems to be enough time. Fortunately, almost everyone knew at least one other person there (sorry T!), so they were able to talk to someone familiar. I’m glad I was able to see everyone, even if it felt weird opening present after present and having all eyes on me. I guess I only like to be in the spotlight when there is a stage and acting involved…
The babies made out like bandits. I think just about everyone got them each one or two outfits (or in the case of some relatives, about 90!). We have a HUGE pile of presents sitting in the living room (still one more load of stuff at my aunts house to pick up). We don’t have room in the babies’ room right now (there’s already a pile of stuff for them in there!). My plan had been to start cleaning the sewing room today to make room for moving furniture from the babies’ room to there. Unfortunately, I haven’t quite gotten started on that yet. That’s not to say I haven’t been productive. I’ve finished all of the thank you notes and will be heading out to mail them in a few minutes (have to finish pumping). I also set up an appointment with the vet for Chili. She woke up at 3 AM and screamed in pain. When I woke up and checked on her, she would yelp any time I touched her leg. This morning she wouldn’t get up and I had to carry her outside to the grass. She seems to be favoring her left front leg and won’t take even a step. She’s been laying on the couch all morning (I put her there). I also made an appointment to take my car in for an oil change and inspection. But I may have to call and change the time. I don’t know that I gave myself enough time between appointments to come home and pump! I didn’t think about it at the time.
Tomorrow we are going to OK for our 3D/4D ultrasound. I’m excited. LD came down for the shower and I did get to feel my little boy kick a couple of times (my daughter appears to be a bit stubborn). I’m looking forward to seeing their adorable little faces tomorrow. I’ll try to post pics on Thursday.
03.08.09
Upswing
I’m sure it’s been pretty obvious over the last month or so that I’ve been fairly hormonal/depressed/moody whatever you want to call it. It’s a wonder N put up with me as long as he did (he did finally snap back at me last week, but I can’t really blame him). I was beginning to wonder if it was the pumping that was making me such a mess. I’m happy to report, that must not be it! Because I’m finally feeling back to my normal self and seeing things in a much more positive light.
The real turning point was Wednesday. I’m not sure if it was seeing the babies, finally finishing my period after having the IUD removed, or a combination of the two that flipped the switch, but I’ll take it. I’m able to smile again and haven’t had even one crying jag since then. Believe it or not, that’s a bit accomplishment.
Thursday and Friday I got to show off the ultrasound pictures at work and break the news to everyone that we were no longer having two girls, but instead one of each. The squealing that went on in that building was deafening! LOL. Also, I finally talked to a student about the babies. It was a teacher’s kid, so I wasn’t quite as concerned about talking to her. She came in and saw the babies’ pictures and said “Wow! You’re having two?” I said “Yes. But they’re not in my tummy. They’re in Oklahoma.” She asked “Are they already borned?” I told her, “No, I have a friend who is keeping them in her tummy.” She looked at me a little funny so I said “Remember how I told you about my heart? Well, my heart can’t take care of a baby inside of me. So my friend is taking care of them until I can.” Her response was “That’s very nice of her.” Yes. Yes, it is!
Yesterday I decided I was tired of my hair being so “blah” so I went in and got it all chopped off. I told the girl “chin length” and I guess it is when it’s wet and/or flat. But as soon as it dries, it’s more like “earlobe length.” It’s okay. I’ll get used to it I’m sure. But for now I’m not really “wowed” by it. However, I went to a gathering with coworkers that evening, and everyone else seemed impressed. Hopefully it will grow on me. N didn’t comment when he got home last night and when I asked him about it he said “I’m trying to figure out if I like it.” Guess we’ll both have to get used to it.
Today I went to visit with my dad before heading over to Ft. Worth to visit a friend and her surrogate who just delivered her son. I got to show Dad the all of the pictures from the ultrasound as well as the DVD. It was nice spending some time with him and I really ought to do it more often, considering he’s not THAT far from me (okay, about 45 minutes, but that’s only 15 more minutes than what I drive to work every day). He’ll be coming over next Saturday to visit when my sister comes up for the shower. She’s going to leave my nephew with me while she and my mom go to my aunt’s house to get things ready for the shower and Dad will come play with W for awhile. Then my sister will come back so we can all go to dinner and then take W back to my aunt’s with her. It is going to be strange not having any of my family staying with me while they are in town.
After visiting with my dad, I went to visit with my friends. I was a little nervous at first, since I’ve only met each of them in person once, but after a little while I relaxed and was SO glad I went. And I think being around a baby might have even increased how much milk I’ll get today. Not 100% sure yet, but we’ll see tonight!
I found it interesting watching the interactions between C and M. C (the mom) had tried to induce lactation but is apparently having some trouble. M (the surrogate) will be pumping once they leave the hospital and go back home. But in the mean time, M has been nursing the baby. I have always said I think I’d be way too jealous of another woman nursing my baby (though LD has said she will if I want her to). But C handed him over without so much as a blink. Why do I feel guilty for feeling like I would be unable to do the same?
Lots of stuff going on. Time seems to be just speeding by and it’s amazing to realize we have less than 100 days (most likely) before we will meet our babies. Part of me can’t wait, and part of me wants things to slow down a little so I can catch up and get ready! LOL
03.05.09
Ultrasound Update
So we had our Level II sonogram yesterday. The babies are looking awesome. Baby 1 is measuring 23w0d and Baby 2 is 23w1d, so right on target. We got to see their spines, hearts, brains, hands, feet, tummies, and adorable little faces (see the pics below). And most interesting of all, we got to see their “naughty bits” as N has been known to call them. And it appears that Dr. K was wise to tell us not to cut the tags off of anything, because he was wrong. We are not having two girls. We are having one of each! Caught Nathan and me by surprise, but LaDonna said “I told you so.” Personally, I think she cheats.
Oh! And we got to feel little Baby 2 move!!! He’s a strong one! LOL Hopefully we’ll get to feel them both some more when LD comes down for my shower in a week and a half. This was just the pick-me-up I needed. As a matter of fact, I got more milk than I have any other day! A grand total of 4.25 oz.
But everyone, please pray for LD. Especially on Wednesdays. She looked SOOO tired. She says that clinical days (Wednesdays) are miserable. But she still insists she doesn’t regret anything. Hopefully she still thinks that in a couple more months. (We love you LD!!!)
02.25.09
Success!
Yesterday I finally saw some results! I got a grand total of 3 oz for the day!!!
Then today I saw a post about a surro that is pumping for her IP’s kid and got 90 oz in a 36 hour period! Needless to say, that kinda burst my bubble a little. Though N reminds me that I’m doing this completely without the extra “hormones” that go along with being pregnant, nor am I taking any herbal supplements, so I’m lucky to be getting what I’m getting. But it’s still disheartening to be so far from being able to completely feed ONE baby, let alone two.
I truly believe that the reason I saw the increase is because I’ve gone back to pumping at night, and I’ve been trying to pump more often during the day when I can. Today I was able to get in 9 sessions. I can’t get that many every day, but I have managed to do at least 8 a day. I really need to contact the LC and ask about a car adapter for the pump so that I can pump on the road to and from doctor appointments or trips to OK. Those two things seem to interfere with my pumping schedule the most.
Speaking of doctor appointments, I’m a bit concerned about Friday’s. I got the bill today from the initial IUD insertion… Insurance did not cover it. So that was $800 for absolutely nothing. And yes, the company has said they will cover a replacement, but does that include the doctor’s fee for putting it in? If not, I don’t think I can afford it. And I’m really, really pissed at my doctor’s office for not saying beforehand that it was likely insurance would not cover a “contraceptive device.” I was only told that AFTER the procedure and when I was at the register to pay. A little late for that information. If I’d been told about the possibility, I would have called my insurance ahead of time to see if it was covered. And when I found out it was not, I would have NOT gotten the darn thing. As it is, I’m debating the wisdom of getting a replacement. I wonder if the company would just refund me the money I spent on the first one, rather than replacing it. Because honestly, I’m leaning towards not wanting it at all. It was extremely painful to put in, then I had a 14 day period, and now, after only one week of no bleeding, I’m bleeding again (though thankfully not nearly as heavy as the last time). It’s just not fair. 
I will be calling in the morning (they closed 5 minutes before I attempted to call this afternoon) to find out what, if anything, I will be expected to pay after Friday’s visit. I know I have to have this one removed, but I sure don’t want another if I’ll have to pay for it to be put in!
By the way, tomorrow we’re 22 weeks. Part of me can’t believe we’re so far along, and part of me can’t believe how much longer we have to wait. I can’t wait for our u/s one week from today!
