01.30.09
Answered prayer
So yesterday was discouraging and I prayed for some encouragement that I’m doing the right thing. I pumped at 1 AM, and got nothing. I pumped again at 5 AM and 7 AM, and still nothing.
Then a coworker of mine came to me with a present. She and I had talked yesterday about my pumping and I told her I had read that having something that smells like a baby can help with bringing in milk. This morning she brought me a onesie that her infant daughter wore yesterday! I was absolutely floored by this thoughtful gift. For someone to be so supportive of what I’m trying to do is very humbling.
Of course, I tried it at my 10:30 AM pumping. And got more (and bigger) drops than I’d ever gotten before! I immediately went to my coworker and gave her a huge hug and thank you for her help. God knew what He was doing. It was just the encouragement I needed. I actually started looking forward to the next pumping session to see if the onesie would work again.
I pumped again at 3 PM (I didn’t like having such a large gap between pumpings, but classes got in the way). Again, I got larger drops than before. But I also got a tiny spot of blood from my right nipple as well. Ouch! I’d already decided I needed to go get some lanolin for my nipples, and that made me doubly sure.
So after work I went and got lanolin, breast pads, sanitary quick wipes for cleaning the pump parts, and a package of receiving blankets. My coworker said she would use the blankets and bring them to me so her little girl can continue to help my milk come in (I was so touched when she said that some day, when her daughter can understand it, she plans to tell her the part she played in helping me!).
When I pumped at 5:30 PM I used the onesie again and I got even more! As a matter of fact, I even got some drops to go into the collection bottle! Granted, I still couldn’t really collect it, but it was WAY more than before.
On the way home from dinner my right nipple started to tingle/itch/hurt. I think it’s gotten pretty chapped. I’ve used the lanolin, which I think has started to help, but that nipple still looks pretty raw. I went ahead and pumped again at 9:00 and there was even more! The drops came almost immediately after starting the pump and there was enough in the bottle that I could shake it around in the bottom. I decided to try and see how much it was by collecting it in a syringe. The total from both breasts was .2 ml. Not a lot, but certainly more than I’ve gotten so far!
I want to save what I’m getting (now that there’s enough to actually collect), but I read that breastmilk can only be stored for 3 months in the regular freezer (we don’t have a deep freeze). So by the time the babies would be here the milk (colostrum) would be bad. 
I put the syringe into the freezer anyway, but I don’t know what the point is. I don’t want it to go to waste, but I don’t want them to be here in less than 3 months either. I guess I’ll save the colostrum and then decide later what to do with the milk as it comes in. (what a wonderful problem to have!)
Oh, yeah. I also made my appointment today to get an IUD put in. I will be having that procedure done on Monday at 4:30.
So to summarize:
- pumped at 1 AM, 5 AM, 10:30 AM, 3:00 PM, 5:30 PM, 9:00 PM, and 11:00 PM (only seven times today. Oops. Gonna have to work on that.)
- Took More Milk Plus and Goat’s Rue 1 cap each 4 times daily.
- Drank Mother’s Milk Tea (2 cups) this morning.
- Was able to get small amounts of colostrum! Much more than the previous days of pumping.
01.29.09
Getting Pumped
Today was the first day of pumping at work. Can’t say it was fun, but at least I managed to do it. Well, mostly. I was so nervous that I’d get interrupted that I was constantly looking over my shoulder. I did, however, manage to do some work while I pumped. Of course, I don’t think I got a single drop all day. Probably because I was so distracted.
I really hope it will get easier. I’m not sure why I was so worried. I mean, most people at work already know what’s going on, and I put a sign on my door saying “Please Do Not Disturb.” I even put up a curtain between my office and the one next to mine (we are connected by a doorway). And I was working on a sound recording, so if someone who didn’t know what was going on asked, I could have said the sign was so no one interrupted my sound recording.
I have had a lot of support coming from people all around me (I cannot say how much having N’s support has meant to me!). I guess I didn’t quite expect that. I kept thinking people would tell me I was crazy for even trying. And sometimes I wonder if I am. But I really do want to try, and pray that God will give me strength through this. I know it will be tough, but I’m hoping it will be worth it in the end.
So to keep track of what I did today:
- Pumped at 1 AM, 5 AM, 8 AM, 11 AM, 2 PM, 5 PM, 7 PM, and 10 PM. That’s 8 times in 24 hours.
- Took More Milk Plus and Goat’s Rue, 1 cap each, 4 times.
- Drank 4 cups of Mother’s Milk Tea.
I still haven’t gotten anything more than a drop or two, and those drops don’t even drip off the nipple and into the pump. I know I need to be patient, but it’s SO hard. I know it’s only been a couple of days, and without the domperidone it may take a little extra time to get things to progress. I just know that as soon as I start getting some significant drops (and more consistent) it will be easier to be optimistic. In the mean time, I’ll continue to pray, and ask for yours.
01.28.09
Ice Day
So the first full day of pumping went a little easier than I thought it would… We had an ice day, so I was home all day! Except when I had to go to my doctor’s appointment.
So I’ve figured out a few things.
- Pumping is only “fun” the first time. After that it looses its charm.
- Drops are only exciting for a little while. Then you want more.
- Even watching “Bringing Home Baby” back to back all day doesn’t make the milk magically come in.
- After awhile, your nipples feel like they’re still in the pump, even when they’re not.
- Patience, while it may be a virtue, is not something I’m good at.
So, all kidding aside, I was a little disappointed when I didn’t get anything more than I did yesterday. As a matter of fact, I didn’t always get even one drop! But I keep reminding myself that it will get better.
I took my herbs right on time all day today, ate oatmeal, and even bought myself some Mother’s Milk Tea. The tea didn’t smell great, but it was actually pretty good. It says to drink it 3-5 times a day, but we’ll see if I can do that.
Well, it’s time, once again, to pump. So I’ll have to end here. Once again, wish me luck!
01.27.09
Keeping track
My LC told me she wants me to write down everything I do (regarding lactation), since I’ll be her first client who has induced lactation (IL) without domperidone or reglan. I told her I already have been journaling the surrogacy, so I figure why not keep track of the IL progress here too? So here goes…
Yesterday was my last day of BCP. Since I take mine at night, I figured it would be good to wait until evening to start pumping. Especially since this meant I would not have to be at work when first figuring out this whole pumping thing. However, I did take More Milk Plus and Goat’s Rue this morning, and at lunch (though I realize now I need to take it about 20 minutes before lunch in order to follow the instructions of not drinking much for 20 minutes following). I got home about 4:00 and started pumping around 4:30. Nothing much was happening, but I didn’t get disappointed, as I didn’t really expect anything on the first day (or even the first few days, to be honest). However, as I finished my second round of 7 minutes (the protocol says to pump 5-7 minutes, massage breasts, then pump 5-7 more minutes) I noticed there was a drop of liquid on the right nipple (sorry if TMI)! 
I was super excited.
I almost forgot about my third dose of herbs, but managed to remember around 6:00. After eating dinner N and I were watching TV (on our brand new 65″, installed today!). Around 7:30 I got out the pump and started pumping while we watched. To my utter amazement I didn’t just get a single drop, I got several!!! From each breast (though still more on the right)!!! I cannot believe I actually got something so soon. I hope this bodes well and means it won’t be long before I’m getting actual sprays of milk. I always suspected I’d be a natural at breast feeding. Perhaps I am right! 
I will continue to pray, as I know this is totally in God’s hands. I prayed in the doctor’s office that I would be given a chance to try, and no matter the outcome, I prayed for peace about it. He answered that prayer. I know He has a plan for me, and I pray that I will be able to nourish my babies once they are born.
Wish me luck tomorrow! My first day pumping at work… Yikes!
01.25.09
I wanna see!
I am SO wishing I were in OK right now! LD called me a couple of hours ago to tell me that she saw one of the babies move! Not just felt it, but saw it! How cool is that?! For a better description, read her post on our group blog (see the link in the menu to the right).
This weekend didn’t go exactly as I’d planned. I was supposed to go to Houston to see some friends as well as my mom, sister, and nephew. But it hasn’t been all bad. Both yesterday and today my mom and I have gone “shopping” together… online! LOL. We’ve been looking at baby stuff mostly, but not just baby stuff!
Also, I got my pump and herbs and should get started on pumping in a couple of days. I kind of played with the pump today (putting it together, reading instructions, etc.) so that I won’t be completely confused on my first day to use it. It looks like it won’t be too bad. I do think I’m going to need to purchase something to hold it on so I can work on other things while I’m pumping. Otherwise, I may get behind at work!
I’ve also been working on putting together an invite list for my baby shower that my sister is wanting to throw for me. I’m not sure who to invite. If I invite everyone I want to, it would be WAY too many people. But I don’t want to exclude anyone either. LOL. I never realized I knew so many people! Plus I think N would like to be there, which means we should make it co-ed, which doubles the guest list! Hmmm… That diaper party idea is looking better and better…
It’s funny how seeing the girls look more like real people (with arms, legs, ribs, hearts, and brains!) has really helped make things seem a little more real. That and being told to go ahead with pumping. This is really and truly happening. N and I are going to be parents! I can’t wait to meet our kids! (Though I would like them to wait at least another 19 weeks!) Holy cow! We’re 17 weeks already!!!
01.24.09
Getting started
I just got off the phone with the LC I talked to two weeks ago. She rents hospital grade pumps and also sells the herbs. I’m going over there this afternoon to get my supplies! OMG, this is exciting! (Yes, I realize I’m a little weird )
So I’m trying to decide if I should go ahead and take my last BCP tonight (my pill pack actually lasts ’til Tuesday, but I’ve taken the last 2 months back to back with no inactive pills between) so that I can have my first day of fumbling with the pump on the weekend. Or maybe I should attempt to start Tuesday night? Or would it be a problem to wait until Friday, even though I’ll be off the BCP for a few days (I don’t have any more)? Ack! I’m going to go nuts!
01.22.09
Lactation appointment
Okay, so I told you all earlier this week that I had scheduled an appointment with my OB/GYN to discuss inducing lactation. I was hoping that she would tell me my GP was overly paranoid and that domperidone would be safe for me to take. However, that did not happen.
However, she did not just brush me off like my GP did. She continued to look at other possibilities/protocols. She looked at Reglan, but dismissed that as well (I wouldn’t have wanted to take it anyway). She and her nurse looked and looked. I was actually there for two hours! Finally she recommended this:
I am on a drug called digoxin for my heart. Apparently it can sometimes have the side effect of causing women to lactate (this may explain the small amounts I’ve been known to get, and the strange reaction my breasts had to my nephew when he was a newborn). So she recommended following the Lenore protocol, just without the dom, hoping that the digoxin will sort of take its place. So once I finish my BCP pack (which is Saturday), I’m to start pumping every 3 hours along with starting Blessed Thistle and Fenugreek and eating oatmeal at least 3 times a week.
Looks like I’ll be going this weekend to shop for a pump! I mentioned renting a hospital grade, but the nurse said that the ones you buy now are pretty much the same as the hospital grade. Anyone know if this is true? Should I forgo the hospital grade and just get a good personal pump, or would it be better to start with the hospital grade?
Anyway, so it looks like I’m going to become Elsie pretty soon. I’ve been planning in my head when I’ll be able to fit in the pumpings at work. It’s going to be tight, but I think I might just manage it! Thank goodness we finally got curtains on the window to my office! LOL
Also, LD had an appointment today at the chiropractor. She said it was wonderful and that he is confident he can help make sure Baby A is head down. Yea!
01.20.09
Guess again!
Take a look at the pics again… What are the pictures OF? Not the colors of the pics! LOL And remember, we’re doing a “color” theme… Even for (middle) NAMES!!! (hint, hint)
01.19.09
And they are…
Healthy and adorable! The babies were measuring 5 days ahead, with super long legs. LD glared at N and said “They’re going to be your size, aren’t they?” LOL
It was so very amazing. We got some pics, but they were pretty blurry, so I’m not going to bother posting. It was much more clear in person. OMG, I about cried when I saw one of them kicking at the doctor a he poked and prodded! We could see so much detail. The spines, ribs, brain, heart… even the bones of one little hand curled up next to a cheek! I was in total awe. I cannot wait to hold our little ones in our arms for the first time!
As for the genders, well they weren’t completely forthcoming. One even had the legs firmly crossed for awhile! The doc said not to remove any tags from anything, but that he’s pretty sure we’re having:
I think it’s going to get some getting used to, but N and I are coming around to liking the idea…
01.17.09
16 weeks
As you all know, we have an appointment on Monday to check on the babies. Things are still pretty surreal for me, and I’m trying my hardest to make it feel like reality that I will be a mom in 5 months! I’ve been reading tons of books, looking at baby things online, joined a Twins group online, etc. Well, Thursday I took another step. I went to my first Mothers of Multiples meeting. At first I was REALLY nervous. I didn’t know how people would react to the fact that I’m not physically pregnant. But they were supportive and asked lots of questions. I’ve always been an open book because I find that complete, frank honesty gets more respect from people than if I’m timid about information (they tend to think things are worse than I’m letting on). I actually went to dinner with several of them after the meeting was over.
There was only one person (she was not at the meeting, but was at dinner) who made me feel awkward. I know it was just curiosity on her part, but it was just plain rude. She asked “No offense, but what’s your life expectancy?” I was completely shocked and simply answered “No one knows. And I don’t plan to live my life like it’s going to end tomorrow.” Basically, I felt like she was accusing me of bringing kids into this world who would not get to grow up with a mother. Hello?! Do you think that conversation didn’t happen when making this decision? Why do you think I’m using a surrogate? I want to be here for my kids! Later I really wished I’d said “What’s yours?” in response, but I didn’t. I left before most of them did, so I kind of wonder what they said about me once I was gone.
There were some VERY nice people there, though. One woman, when I said I was hoping to induce lactation and hoped that I’d be able to make enough said “If not, just call me. I’m the human cow! Call me Bessie.” LOL. She was really nice and seemed like my kind of person (much more so than that other woman!). I do plan to attend again next month. Hopefully the awkwardness will decrease and I will feel like I fit in.
Also, I have an appointment on Thursday to see my old OB/GYN. I’d stopped going to her in 2005 when she no longer took my insurance and started going to my GP for my well-woman checkups, since I knew I’d never need the OB aspect of her specialty. Well, since my GP isn’t comfortable with me taking the domperidone, I decided to go to someone who has more experience. I asked if she had helped anyone induce lactation before, and her nurse said she had. So hopefully I’ll have some answers on what I can do and get started ASAP!
Hope everyone is having a great weekend! For about the first time ever, I can’t wait for Monday! LOL
