11.30.08
Thanksgiving Visit
We had a wonderful Thanksgiving with N’s family on Wednesday, then on Thursday I went up to OK to visit with LD and her family (N was working). I got to meet pretty much the WHOLE family (uncles… aunts… cousins… the works!). It was cool. I stayed Thursday and Friday nights, then came home on Saturday.
Thursday night was cute. LD’s kids and I had a “slumber party” in the living room. We were snuggled in to watch Wall-E and I think I fell asleep about 10 minutes in. 
I woke up and saw we were back on the main menu and asked “Why are you starting it over?” To which K answered “It’s over.” And then D comes out and tells the kids “Stop talking in there! As soon as the movie is over, you need to go to sleep!” I told him “It’s my fault. I asked a question.” He laughed and said “Well, you go to sleep too!”
Friday the kids left for their dad’s and LD and I had the afternoon to ourselves. We went maternity clothes shopping! LOL. I’ve never done that before. She looked so cute! I know she’s annoyed that she already has a belly, but I have to say it’s absolutely adorable. 
We also went to a movie with her best friend, then came home and hung out with D. It was a good day.
I was sad to go, and apparently so was my car. It decided to flash a warning light at us as we were heading to lunch (I was planning to leave after lunch). We read in the owner’s manual that it meant I needed antifreeze. So we headed to Auto Zone (after we went in LD’s mom’s car to lunch). Unfortunately, the guy helping us didn’t know what kind of antifreeze to recommend and asked for the manual. So we went back to the house and picked up my car and took it back to Auto Zone (and the light did not turn on this time). The guy looked through the manual and after much head scratching decided to call someone. He came back from the phone and said that my car apparently requires a type of antifreeze that is only sold by VW service centers. Great! So he looked in the phone book and the only one was on the north side of OKC (about 30 minutes in the opposite direction of where I needed to go). LD and I went back to the house and looked online to see if there was anything in the other direction. There wasn’t. So we made the road trip up to the VW dealership in OKC. No lights came on once again, but I didn’t want to risk driving 3 hours and possibly overheating. We arrived at the dealership at 2:15. Apparently on Saturdays they close at 2:00! I was about ready to cry. One of the sales people said I could put water in “for now” and it would be fine. I prayed she was right…
We went back to LD’s house (still no warning light) and waited for the engine to cool off so we could add water. Around 3:30 I was able to add water and head home. I had no problems whatsoever along the way. I have NO idea what the deal was. Guess I’ll be taking my car by the VW dealership tomorrow after my doctor’s appointment.
So tomorrow it’s back to the grind. 
I don’t wanna go! Especially since I’ve got Book Fair this week and I’m going to be exhausted!
Doing great!
Sorry, Lori. I didn’t mean to worry anyone. We got in late last night (11 o’clock) and went straight to bed. As soon as we got up we started working on Thanksgiving dinner (we’re doing it today because N works tomorrow). Now it’s just a matter of waiting for the meat to finish cooking!
The whole gang (N, N’s Mom, sister, and brother, and I) all headed up to OK around 10:30ish. We stopped around 1:00 to grab a quick bite at McDonald’s and then we drove the 15 minutes that were left (I was going nuts being so close!). We arrived just in time. I hopped out of the car and delivered the goodies (Ben & Jerry’s ice cream) before we got back in the car and went to Dr. K’s office. We arrived right on time (whew!).
We thought this was a general OB work up, with the added bonus of an u/s, but we were apparently mistaken. All we got was the u/s (there’s no way we would have left without one. ). But that was enough to put smiles on our faces.
We were all crammed into the little (and warm!) u/s room waiting for Dr. K to come in. When he opened the door I think he was a little surprised at the number of people in the room… Kinda like a clown car! We introduced ourselves (how cool that we got to say we were Mom, Dad, Grandmother, Aunt, and Uncle!!!) and then he got started.
Up popped our little gummy bears! Two perfect little babies. 
One was wiggling its little head while the other one was taking a nap. I told LD “I knew they’d be on different sleep schedules!” She told me she’d try and work on that before she evicts them.
I haven’t scanned the u/s pics into the computer yet, but as soon as I do I’ll post them. They’re starting to be recognizable as little people!
Tomorrow I get to go back up to see LD and her family! I can’t wait. I miss them already.
11.22.08
Making milk
I went to my GP yesterday to see if he might be able to give me anything to make this cold more bearable. Being that I’m already on antibiotics, it’s obviously not bacterial. So he gave me some cough meds and an inhaler, but that’s all he could do.
But while I was there I decided to talk to him about inducing lactation. He didn’t know anything about it (I didn’t really expect him to), but I showed him my book with the protocol and he made copies of the pages that talk about it and says he will be doing research into it. He says he may also talk to an OB/GYN in his building to see if she’s done the protocol with any of her patients before and might have me go through her. He did go ahead and prescribe the Ortho-Novum, though, since I need to be on BCP right now anyway (since we don’t want me getting pregnant) and he figured there was no point in putting me on something else just to switch me. I’m excited that I’m a step closer and that my GP is taking this seriously.
On a side note, I have a pretty good relationship with most of my doctors, so it was fun messing with him just a little. Actually, his nurse was really the one messing with him. I told her I was expecting twins and she looked at me funny (I’d just told her about all of the surgeries lately). I explained the situation and then I heard her in the hallway saying to the doctor “Nicole’s expecting twins!” I shouted out the door “Are you trying to scare him?!” She said “Aren’t you going to go congratulate her?” I heard him say “I’m not sure what to say.” She said “You say congratulations.” I was laughing so hard by the time he walked in. He said “You don’t look like you’re expecting twins.” Of course, by this point he HAD to have remembered our conversation this summer about me pursuing surrogacy because he didn’t ask questions (or faint, as he’d once said he would do if I ended up pregnant). He was happy for me and supportive in my plans to induce lactation.
11.19.08
Back to work
I went to work today. Man, I’m tired! But I’m not sure what’s making me more tired. Getting back into the routine after being away for essentially 8 work days. Or maybe the stupid head cold I now have.
Yes, I felt absolutely fine while in the hospital on IV antibiotics. But now that I’m out (and still on antibiotics), I feel like crap. How is that possible?? If I’m already on antibiotics, how did germs invade my body? Just doesn’t make sense. 
Oh, and I guess I should update with some new info. First of all, I went to the ID doctor’s office yesterday and picked up all the little bulbs of antibiotic that I will be giving myself between now and Monday (when I go in for blood work and to get more). I will, apparently, be taking the IV antibiotics for the next 3 weeks. Longer than I expected, but at least it’s not 6 weeks like last time?
On the way to that appointment I talked to Dr. P (I’d called her earlier, but that was when she called me back). At the time that I talked to her, she hadn’t yet heard from Dr. D. I explained what was happening and that we were going to have to go with an epicardial lead (on the outside of the heart). She said she would call Dr. S and get his take on things. I asked if she thought I’d need to go up to the Mayo Clinic to have the surgery. She said “Oh, no. I’m thinking local.” I said “Good. Because I really didn’t want to go to MN in December.” To which she replied “You know, come to think of it there’s a clinic in Hawaii… And if you go there you need your medical escort… And really, it will be a six month recovery period… Very rough, full of Mai-Tais!” LOL She cracks me up! I told her I was all for that choice. Anyway, she told me she’d try to get ahold of Dr. S, but couldn’t say how long it might take to get ahold of him. I said we had time, since I have to finish the antibiotics anyway, and I’d like to aim for Winter Break (she’d already thought of needing to get it done before the end of the year so I don’t have to start over on deductible!)
While I was still at the ID office she called again. Apparently shortly after we got off the phone, Dr. D called. AND she was able to get ahold of Dr. S and talk to him and he’s getting a team together to figure out when/where the surgery will happen and who will do it. I’m amazed at how fast that happened, given how long its taken on every step up to now. She did say that it may take awhile to make a decision, but at least I know that the right people are working on it already.
I go in to see Dr. D for a follow up on Tuesday morning, then N and I will be driving up to OK to see LD and the babies (OB appointment). So things are moving right along. I can’t believe it’s one week until Thanksgiving (which I’ll be spending with LD and her family and I’m SOOOO excited about that!!!).
11.18.08
Home again
I’m home!! My right arm hurts from the PICC line, but at least I got to sleep in my own bed and no one came in to take my vitals at 4 AM. No, instead my dog asked to be let out. I’ve been up for about an hour because I couldn’t get back to sleep. I imagine a nap will be in order later today!
Mentally, I’m doing much better than yesterday. Once I knew (or at least sort of knew) what I was dealing with I felt much better. As I told my doc last night, my most anxious times come when I feel like I don’t know what’s going on. I think he’s starting to get that message. Did I tell you he gave me his cell number so that if his stinkin’ office staff is giving me fits I can bypass them completely! I made sure he knew how much that eased my mind!
Right now the plan is this. I will go in to the ID doc today to get started on my home IV antibiotics. Not sure yet how long I’ll have to be on that, but at least another 5 days (I’ve already been on it for 5 days in the hospital). In the mean time, Dr. D is going to be talking with my cardiologist (Dr. P) and the Children’s EP (Dr. S) that sat in on my last procedure. We’re going to be going back in, but only after the incision site is “cooled down” as he put it. He’s going to defer to Dr. P and Dr. S on who should do it. He knows that the surgeons he works with will not be able to do it with my anatomy. We are now at the point where the only option left is to place that wandering lead onto the outside of my heart, which will require a bit more invasive action.
We hope to have this next surgery done prior to the new year for two reasons. One, more time to heal before the babies’ arrival. Two, don’t have to start over on the deductible with insurance (who is paying 100% at this point). As much as I hate to do it, I’m actually thinking that scheduling it for Christmas break would be the best option. As I said last night “Not that I want to miss out on family stuff, but at least they don’t dock my pay!”
So that’s where we are right now. I plan to call and talk to Dr. P later today and get her thoughts on the matter. I don’t know if she’ll want me to go back to Mayo, Texas Children’s, or if she thinks there’s anyone local that can do it. I will feel even better once I have an idea of where this is going to happen.
Thanks again for all the support!
11.17.08
Another update
Well, at least I get to go home today. Even if it is with a PICC line for IV antibiotics… Apparently this was decided because they are *probably* going back in. Don’t know when/where yet, but hopefully it won’t take as long as last time to figure it out! I’d like to have it done before the end of the year so I don’t have to start over on my deductible.
Last night I finished reading Multiple Blessings by Kate Gosslin (of Jon and Kate Plus Eight). It really was an excellent book and gave me a profound respect for Kate. Her faith is so strong, and she has taken every opportunity to learn a lesson from what God has handed her. I’m trying, really hard, to see the lesson I’m to learn from all this. I think I’m too in the moment. But I have Faith that He has a plan for us. He wouldn’t have blessed us with LD or the twins if He didn’t plan to see us through this current hurdle. It’s hard to see a reason why, but I guess I’m not supposed to know just yet. Lord, I’m trying. I know you’re talking, and I’m trying SO hard to listen!
Thanks for your unwavering love and support. I need it so much right now!
Ugh! Not again!
Why can’t I catch a freakin’ break?!
As you know, I’m back in the hospital due to a possible infection. Yesterday the infectious disease doc said I’d get to go home today, he just needed to figure out if I’d be going home on oral or IV antibiotics…
However, I had been having some more “twitching” (diaphragmatic pacing) off and on and last night it was at it’s worst (I got very little sleep because of it). I have reminded the docs and nurses all weekend that it needed to be checked, but nothing was done. Until I reminded the PA who was about to look into discharging me. They sent a Medtronics rep to my room and low and behold, there is no setting he can put me on that will keep that darn twitching at bay! So once again they’ve turned that lead off, sent me down to x-ray, and now I’m waiting to find out the verdict.
I’m on the edge here, folks, of what I can handle. I’m trying my hardest to have faith that God will see me through yet another hurdle, but I’m just SO tired of this! After the surgery last week (yes, exactly one week ago today) the doc said that if the lead didn’t stay in place this time, we have no other options and we’ll have to do epicardial lead placement, which requires a surgeon and he doesn’t feel any of his guys can do it, so I’d have to go to Children’s here in Dallas, Texas Children’s in Houston, Cook Children’s in Ft. Worth, or back to the Mayo Clinic.
I’m trying to stay positive and not think the worst, but it’s darn hard right now. And to top it off, I sent N to work today because I figured I’d be going home and we don’t need to lose out on any more of his paycheck, since we’re now losing out on mine (all out of sick days). So I’m sitting here all by myself, near tears, but trying REALLY hard to hold it in.
11.16.08
Yes, I’m an idiot.
I meant zofran, not zoloft. Call it a “mental moment.” Call it “pregnancy brain.” Call it “hospital insanity.” Call it whatever you want. But she still likes it.
Still here…
in the hospital. Nothing new to update. I’m still sitting here in the hospital bored out of my mind. Though last night N and our friend, K, decided we should play the new Battlestar Galactica board game that N couldn’t resist purchasing earlier this week. We started at 8 o’clock. Game lasted until 12:45! 
Needless to say I was darn tired by the time they finally left. And I slept HARD. Of course, the nurse (who is named LD!) came in to give me my IV and the tech came in to check vitals and draw blood, but I kept right on sleeping. Even after the shift change and my new nurse came to introduce herself… I finally woke up when the phone rang. It was room service asking if I was going to order breakfast. I figured I should, so I mumbled out a reply and forced myself to sit up. It was 9 o’clock! I can’t remember the last time I slept that late!
LD has been simply miserable. She’s had worse nausea with this pregnancy than she has in any of her other pregnancies. She hasn’t thrown up, just felt so sick she can barely eat. I feel so bad. She got a prescription for zoloft and once she took it she felt worlds better. Unfortunately, she was only given 3 days supply! I hope we find a solution! I don’t want her to suffer like this through the whole pregnancy (though hopefully the end of the 1st trimester will bring an end to it). Say a prayer that we find a cure!
